I don’t really know how it’s possible, but I feel busier than ever. As I’ve aged, I really feel like I need more sleep and downtime (obvs) and my ability to transition between things has been diminishing. I probably used to be able to turn from one thing to another in quick succession, picking something up and then putting it down – there was a period of my life where I was: working full time, going to school half to full time, running and training a lot, and raising my kids. I look at that now and say…woah, how did I do that?
The big sad news is that our friend Erik Ledbetter passed away very suddenly at work about 3 weeks ago. You can read about him here. The funeral service was this weekend, so we got to see Owen and Lynn and met Erik’s mother. And, as is true of both weddings and funerals, we got to say hello to lots of friends that are in the neighborhood but we never see. (Vince and Owen became eagle scouts together). And see lots of grown up boys we’ve known since they were in 2nd grade. It was wonderful to catch up and also sad to be together for this reason. Erik followed his heart and became a park ranger about a decade ago and he loved it so much. I’m so happy he got to do that because he was so unhappy at his desk job before – did he go to Yale and Hopkins? I want to say yes.
I’ve been busy trying to get Edda settled into her day program which is supposed to start on August 11th – though still slightly unclear. I’m also trying to switch Eliana and Ginny over to the new system which will pay them less than they were being paid by the youth programs. I will spare you the saga and total weird vibes we’ve gone through with the onboarding which feels…like a big weird scam. At each point in the process, I’m like, is this a scam? It sure feels like a scam. And we proceed. And as they will be paid less than they were just 4 weeks ago, we will supplement their pay to bring it up to what I consider a fair-ish wage and covering the onboarding fees. Both Eliana and Ginny are stepping through the process without complaint – if you can believe it, it’s already been like over $150 of fees per person to onboard onto this new company and we haven’t yet finished with it all – maybe 50% done.
I’m also busy looking into joining a bunch of parent-led organizations for housing for adult special needs kids. The most compelling is called the Neighborhood of Maryland which is a model in which there are 19 houses that you buy (only 1 house, probably about 1-1.5 million dollars each (!)) and then there is a neighborhood enrichment center for the kids to go to during the day. I like the energy of the folks running the program, I’m not quite sure it’s right for Edda, but I’m going to help out to see what it’s about.
Jeremy’s been so busy at work which is a good thing, but I just see him squirreling away at work stuff all day – which makes him in a good mood and then I’m in a good mood.
He’s also been hard at work trying to buy us a new car. We’ve been talking a lot about cars – this is what we have now – a 2014 Honda Accord hybrid and we are borrowing my parents’ 2010 Honda CRV for the summer while they are on the west coast. Having two cars shows just just how rarely we use the 2nd car. We probably drive the 2nd car once every 10 days.
But, the 2014 Honda Accord drives me crazy in a few ways: it doesn’t fit Edda’s wheelchair very well, you have to kind of tetris it into the trunk and it make a high pitched whine when you accelerate that I can hear and Jeremy can not hear. And, of course, it’s not a modern car with Apple play and all the computer integration and cameras, etc which we really enjoy when renting a car. It barely knows about Bluetooth. My parents car from 2010 is even worse – without a backup camera, you have to twist your entire body to see out the back window and even then, you don’t know if there is a short toddler like 2 feet behind your back bumper (important to us, because there is an errant toddler in our neighborhood who is known to elope and wander the ‘hood by herself with no fear).
Our general philosophy has been to buy new cars and drive them into the ground, but this can not happen anymore. We drive so infrequently and for such short distances that we no longer can “use up” a car. We are essentially, car-wise, little old ladies that only use the car to drive to church on Sundays. Then we have to shift our thinking because I want all the modern conveniences and safety features of a new car and I do want to try to keep up with new technologies and not be afraid of trying new things. Is the 2014 Honda Accord “used up”? The answer is clearly no. But do we want a new car? The answer is “yes”. We probably have to switch our mindset from a “mileage” age to just a straight “age” age.
Compounding our car desires, we want to buy an electric car that is 1) not a Tesla, 2) Edda can get into and out of easily and 3) has trunk space for her wheelchair. This is not an easy combination. Jeremy has been going to car dealerships and measuring the distance from the ground to the seat in various models. What we really want is a station wagon, but literally no one in America makes a station wagon anymore. Everyone loves the SUV or small SUV form factor which is too tall for Edda to get in without installing a chair lift.
Anyways, I think we are going to buy a Kia (!). And Jeremy is looking over the financing from a few dealerships to see which one has the “best deal” which is incredibly difficult because they leave out key fees and clear documentation and just focus on the monthly payment – so one can’t figure out immediately which one is “better”. gah. drives me crazy that it’s so hard. After months of being sort of unhappy about getting a new car, I’m quietly excited. It’s so expensive, it also took me time to really wrap my head around how much cars cost these days which is….a lot.
