Author: Doris

Everyone is OK, we are all ok. It’s been an eventful few days. On Tuesday, Jeremy left for Sacramento very early in the morning – like 5 am. This was a last minute business trip only Tuesday – Thursday. Normally we both don’t like scheduling a cross country trip for only 1.5 days of meetings, but there is so much going on (I think mostly at Jeremy’s work), that he couldn’t spare more time.

At the same time, late Monday night, Edda had a couple of seizures which is not super out of the ordinary for her. She bit her tongue pretty badly, but she seemed otherwise OK – so I sent her to school and aftercare on Tuesday, texting the folks there she might not be eating very well. I managed to get her seizure meds in her Tuesday morning and sent her to school.

So, predictably, she did not eat on Tuesday and on the way home from aftercare, she had a seizure in Ginny’s car and then after Ginny left, she had two more and by this time, I was struggling to get anything into her (like water), let alone her meds.

She had one seizure Tuesday during the night. On Wed, I kept her home – kind of hoping the seizures would abate (they usually do), but by now she’s missed two doses of her seizure meds. But she seemed otherwise, again, OK.

I took the day as a sick day and took her on my errands – first, to the vet.

Inexplicably the vet is one of Elka’s favorite places. She loves the vet (yes, they spayed her. yes, they give her shots). I think it’s because she gets that spray cheese from the can there? I’m not sure, but she’s the only pet I’ve ever had who LOVES the vet. They offered to consolidate our visits because some of the vaccines are out of sync, but I told them it wasn’t necessary because they are just down the street and Elka loves to see them as often as possible. So we were there for her flu shot, which we have not yet gotten as humans.

And since it was a beautiful day and we were all loaded into the car, I took everyone to the dog park. And while I was there, Edda had another seizure. By this time, I’m texting Jeremy trying to figure out what to do. Her tongue is getting bitten each time she seizes, and therefore getting more and more swollen, and the likelihood of me getting her to eat or drink anything is getting lower and lower. It’s this time, I propose to Jeremy to take her to the ER to get an NG tube (down the nose into her stomach) so I can get meds and food into her. We all hesitated because sometimes (I hear from other Rett parents) that the hospital would go all into figuring out about the seizures and not doing the NG tube because they aren’t familiar with Rett syndrome. It’s weird, but I didn’t care about the seizures (I mean finding out what they are or what they are like) because I know it’s from the Rett and really will never go away, I just cared about being able to feed her and getting the meds in her. We decided to try to touch base with her neurologist at CHOP and go home and go from there.

So after I got home, I had lunch myself – for Edda, I bought all the soft food I could – rice pudding, chocolate pudding, ice cream, bananas, applesauce, etc. But she was having none of it. We were in email correspondence with CHOP, but the turnaround on the advice was slow. About 2 pm, she had, yet another seizure, and by then, her tongue was bleeding pretty profusely and I told Jeremy, I need to go to the ER because now I just needed the seizures to stop.

So I packed our bags in case we were going to be admitted and headed down to Children’s Hospital in downtown DC. I am grateful Edda still qualifies for treatment at a children’s hospital – the age limit is usually 21. If this was next year, I wouldn’t be able to swing being treated at Children’s. It took me about 90 minutes to get there, a lot of traffic – uneventful, no seizures from Edda. And then I walked Edda in her wheelchair into a packed ER waiting room and looked at the displays which had each waiting person listed by number (I would estimate about 25 people waiting to be seen), how long they had been waiting (someone had been waiting at least 3.5 hours) and the order in which they were planning on calling them back. I sighed and thought, this is going to be a long, long wait. I wait 5 minutes to register and got up to the desk and handed over Edda’s ID and got her registered and then the person said, give me a minute and I’ll come around and give her an ID band and as he turned around, Edda started in on another seizure, blood spurting from her mouth, and I slammed my hand against the little glass barrier between me and the registrar and said – she’s having a seizure RIGHT NOW. And, just like that, we skipped the line of 25 people, got rushed back into room 31, where a team of 6 people worked to stabilize her, give her a big shot of versed and let her recover from her approx 10th seizure in 36 hours.

As they got her settled, they looked at me and I asked if I they could put in an NG tube and send her home with me. And the attending (Sam) was like – yes! I like that plan. Let’s stabilize her and send her home. At that time, Dr. Marsh from CHOP called and I handed my phone to Sam and said – OK you two docs, talk to each other. And Dr. Marsh told Sam all the orders he recommended and also they both approved my plan of being sent home with an NG tube. And OMG, the NG tube got put in, the placement confirmed with x-ray, the labs drawn, the meds in and discharge all happened in quick succession. We were out of the ER before midnight. Maybe less than 6 hours. Unbelievable. Shout out to all the staff, our nurse Isabella, Sam the attending, the x-ray tech, everyone, everyone was very nice, very fast and super competent. I was very, very impressed.

I feel so grateful I feel so comfortable in a hospital, I gowned Edda myself from the pile of gowns that turned up in a closet which I found, turned off lights when we were alone, turned off suction or oxygen when it was clear that we didn’t need it and was making a lot of noise so we could rest better. I know if you are a patient in a hospital, you don’t want to touch anything because everything is scary and new. I’m grateful I can work an NG tube and can help the nurse insert it, help the X-ray tech position Edda, look at the x-ray and see that the NG tube is placed well.

Edda sporting her new NG tube – it’s full of blood from her stomach because she swallowed so much blood from injuring her tongue.

I’m grateful to Seni who took public transit to come stay at the house overnight to feed/walk and keep Elka company. There is no one Elka loves more when we are gone than Seni. We are all at home now, recovering. Edda’ll have the NG tube in until she can eat properly again. She’s on extra strong seizure meds for at least 3 days as we figure out how to manage this new clustering of seizures that seem to be happening more frequently.

Jeremy is flying home tonight, can’t wait to see him! We are all hunkering down at home and taking it easy.

Jeremy flew to Sacramento today (or is flying as I type this), it’s the first time in a while that Vince isn’t there to have a meal with him. It was so nice for Jeremy to tie in a visit with Vince with a work trip, but now no longer.

On Sunday night, Eric and Colleen hosted family dinner. They served cheese they had gotten on their European trip. I was very happy about the cheese. I have stopped eating cheese in the house, going from about 1.5 blocks of cheddar a week to nothing now. Does it make a difference? I’m not sure, I think I’m making it up in ice cream (out of the house) unfortunately.

Elka sleeping on clean laundry.

I went on a long hike with Kristen yesterday morning, it was such a beautiful day! Elka also came along and had a blast chasing squirrels. K came over to the house and met Jeremy for the first time and we went out for vegan food at Shouk. And I talked to my lovely mother…

We started the weekend with a spa night at Main Street. Ginny came and helped with dinner and a face mask (the spa type, not the virus type) while we wrapped up our work week. We eventually made our way there and helped with putting on stick-on-nails and other such things.

Edda is not a total fan of spa night.

Saturday was Jeremy’s 56th birthday and we celebrated in a low-key way. He went on a long bike ride, I went to the dog park and guitar lesson. Edda hung out with Eliana during the day and went out to lunch. I wore a mostly-blue outfit. I’m not sure I love this outfit, but the shoes, cufflinks (!) and tied neck scarf are the stars.

And I matched the glasses too! lol. I think this looks a bit too much like a flight attendant. But I wanted to use these cufflinks which are vintage from Jeremy’s maternal grandfather (?). I’ve had them tucked far in the back somewhere, but recently unearthed them and realized I had a thrifted shirt which needed cufflinks.

And in the evening, we went to celebrate Jeremy’s birthday by going to a new taco place in our town’s center and I’m trying to learn to use non single use utensils. I carry the foon (fork/spoon) and the collapsible cup in my purse and I try to remember to deploy them appropriately. (The red one is Edda’s). This photo is in front of Ben and Jerry’s where I Edda and I split a two-scoop cone. We ordered one cone with two scoops and then I slid the top scoop into the cup and Edda got that scoop and I got the other scoop/cone.

I kind of like this out-of-focus photo of Edda.

Jeremy shows his love for ice cream. Happy birthday sweetie, I hope you had a wonderful day and many, many more for you 🙂

Literally like 8 years ago, Ning and Brian planted this dogwood tree in the backyard. Immediately, the deer ate all the leaves. Then they tried to defend it by placing a “fence” around it – like metal stakes and plastic chicken wire and immediately they overpowered it. Every year, the poor tree struggled, but manage to keep living. Last year, I took down the fence and put a mesh bag over it. But because the mesh had 0.5 inch square, they managed to scoot the leaves through the little holes and eat all the leaves. Again, the tree lived. This year, I put a fine mesh over the entire tree and are we winning? I’m not sure. There are still leaves on the tree, but the baby deer are trying mightily to eat all the leaves and I can see the damage. I’m also not entirely sure the tree will, in the end, live – because there is damage in the trunk very close to the ground, so even if it was without deer, I’m not sure it is destined to have a long life. But I like that it’s trying, trying – every year.

It is my dream to put in a deer-proof fence. We’ll see. We also need it for Elka who wants nothing more than to lie outside in the sun.

We spent a lot of the long weekend working on the house. Jeremy spent a lot of time putting the final touches on the stove – covering the holes in the base of the cabinet so pots/pans can be stored there.

I’m, surprisingly, enjoying learning to work as a team in this capacity. We are a pretty good team.

Puppies came to the house on Labor Day. They did what puppies do. They were super cute with huge personalities and sharp claws and they proceeded to make little poops and pees in the house in mysterious places that we had to hunt for.

My OOTD!

I have a friend Ward, who I know via my group guitar lessons, who runs an Olympic weight lifting gym and has been encouraging me to attend the Sunday workout session in Frederick about 30 minutes away. Jeremy is very interested in weightlifting and especially Olympic weightlifting and he knows all the folks on the US National team (I mean, on social, not in real life, obvs). So I proposed to Jeremy that we both go, I really know nothing, but it looks fun.

We went to the gym and borrowed shoes. I didn’t know there were special shoes, but apparently there are. Are there any sports without special shoes, I asked? I think not. Maybe swimming? You don’t need shoes while you are swimming, but you need the flip flops for pre-swimming (getting to the pool).

Edda came to watch us (there was a special needs teacher at the practice who recognized Edda!)

This is Ward – he’s teaching Jeremy how to snatch. There is an explosive movement that needs a lot of coordination.

OK, this might look heavy, but they had to keep trying to find lighter and lighter weights so I could do this – I think this is less than 25 pounds total – the two red plastic plates and the bar. Haha, I think they had me try at first with 15 kilos, but really I could not do this with 15 kilos. Ward kind of tilted his head and said – huh. 15 kg- that’s too heavy? And then I laughed and said – I’m a regular person! Like a middle age regular non-lifting person. To give you perspective on how far I am from anything, the female world record on snatch at my weight is something like 105 kg – 231 pounds. I don’t think I could even lift 231 pounds off the ground one inch let alone throw it above my head.

We mis-timed lunch (we left the gym about noon and everyone was starving) and had to eat two cookies and some pound cake that we found at a farmer’s market for lunch.

Then (so social!) in the afternoon, Megan came over to Edda’s delight and she taught me to crochet.

I’ve knit a lot before, but never crochet and I admired a kit she had when we last got together and ordered it also myself.

Sooo, we spent late afternoon happily playing with string (which, as I tell Vince all the time, is what we did before the internet was invented.)

I’m at the dog park this morning with Elka – it’s been so hot and so busy (for me in the morning) this week, that I haven’t been able to take her to the dog park until today and she’s been giving me the side-eye allll week – like life is soooooo boring you folks are so boring, can I see my friends? So we made it here today. It’s totally not as good as New Hampshire with acres of woods and water and dog friends, but it’s the best I can do here in the regulated suburbs. We are certainly not Live Free or Die here in Rockville.

Vince and Dani are on their way to Berlin right now to meet up with Bob – this is his graduation gift to them both. Everyone is very excited, fingers crossed that everyone stays well, I’ve not seen so many people mask traveling in a long time. Bob kind of sheepishly said during our vacation in NH that he couldn’t resist and bought them all tickets to the Berlin Philharmonic on their last night in town. He was kind of worried that they’d be bored? Annoyed at listening to classical music? Jeremy and I said that they would truly would enjoy the world’s premiere orchestra playing in their home performance hall. I wish I could see the Berlin Phil in Berlin! Someday!

Vince sent us his graduate student handbook that he got (I was like – what’s a grad student handbook?) and we looked over it. There are a lot of classes and 2 qualifying exams (which I was relieved to see the format of was and wasn’t anything like mine) and Vince was like – I’m starting to get overwhelmed and I’m like, it’ll be much better once it starts, it’s killer just waiting around for something to start (he’ll start mid-late September).

I was talking to Dani earlier this week (probably the first time I’ve talked to them without Vince on the phone too) and mentioned that I was trying to get in touch with their mother to really thank her and Jeff for moving Vince from Davis to Irvine, but I felt like I was playing phone tag with her (Jeremy also said that I avoid actual voice phone calls which is true)…anyways – literally 12 hours later, Dani’s mom (Loanne) called me and said – I heard that you were trying to get in touch with me? I’m like – Dani told you? Like right after I told her? It’s not that I disapprove or anything, it’s just the speed of communication between parent/ grown child was very impressive. I talk to Vince like once a week and usually, he calls. I thought once a week was impressive. And then I asked Vince, so how often does Dani talk to their mom? And he was like at least twice a day. And then I said – TWICE A DAY? And then he said well…Loanne calls me twice a day. I was like…wha?!!!

So I recounted this story to Jeremy, Edda and Ginny at dinner last night and Jeremy joking said – you are totally jealous. And I said, I’m not jelly. And then I tried to defend myself. And then I said – Ok, maybe I’m a little jelly. Hahaha. OK, I’m only *slightly* jealous. I’m not jealous of the phone calls really, because I hate the phone, I’m mostly jealous that Loanne and Jeff are literally 10 minutes from Vince and Dani and get to see them a lot not on the phone. I do wish I could do that. Not right now. But maybe someday!

For about 3 months now, I’ve been renting clothing from Rent the Runway and it’s been more fun than I thought it would be. This might have been the best dress I rented. I wore it yesterday to a prep meeting for a golf fundraiser for Main Street, to date night and to a choir rehearsal (more on that later). So many compliments and I felt great!

A cute little bow detail on the slight open back. Very fun. And I had all the accessories – red shoes from Rothy’s more than half off from ebay, my red watch and red hot chili pepper earrings gifted from Katherine. My hair is kind of a disaster, no? That’s OK, I never really see the back.

It was our 26th anniversary yesterday and Ginny was kind enough to take Edda out for dinner so Jeremy and I headed out and he dressed up to match me and we had our anniversary dinner at our favorite local Chinese restaurant, then we went to the container store where he bought me a jewelry box and then to Ben and Jerry’s where we played pokemon go and got ice cream cones. A perfect night. Love you sweetie. We make a good team.

Let’s see, I’m sorry I’ve been quiet. Just a long time to get back into a routine. I can’t remember which day we did what, so it’s just going to be what the pictures lead me to be. We went to another archive – The Historical Society of Cheshire County. Again, very interesting and Katherine left a copy of her book about her family with them.

Such nice staff again! A pleasure to meet people who are really into history and their little town.

I did get to paddleboard – Katherine wanted to find a lake that both paddle boarding and doggie rambling could happen, but we could only find lakes which were one or the other. Anyways, we found the paddleboarding lake (no dogs allowed!) and I was the only one to partake of the activity. But it was a lot of fun and I didn’t drag the paddleboard up the eastern seaboard for no reason. PFD (personal floatation device) on!

Edda enjoyed walking around the sand.

And we all enjoyed one of my favorite lunches ever – I do like picnic lunches at a park on a beautiful day after some physical exertion. Notice I’m wearing a Keene State College shirt, I’m repping the local college. Why you may ask? Because I forgot to pack T-shirts and had to go to a thrift store to purchase some. It is not a vacation until Doris forgets to pack an entire category of clothing. Yes, I probably should have a packing list, but I like to live on the edge.

That evening we went to G. Foote’s house – a relative of Katherine’s. He went to MIT and has done well for himself, so he has this enormous, gorgeous house on a hill with 90 acres. The dogs went wild running through the woods, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Elka more happy.

On Friday we drove home. When we began, the AC would not turn on, and we were sweaty and/or grouchy. I’m usually very good at finding a restaurant along our route, but because of traffic, google was rerouting use more than usual and I’d find a place and then it turned out we weren’t driving through that town. And there were a lot of constraints: fast, not a chain, outdoors seating for the dogs and able to see and be near the car to prevent bike theft. But I did triumph and find a place to eat (not this photo, this was at a gas station).

We stayed with Bob and Katherine one night. The dogs did so well on this trip, I was very impressed and they got along swimmingly.

The next day, Jeremy dropped me off at the Philly airport where I flew to Traverse City, MI to hang out with a friend of mine and her husband and child. Jeremy continued on back home to Maryland with Edda and Elka.

Lael who usually lives in Brooklyn has a lovely lakeside home in Traverse City and invited me to spend the weekend up there. I got to know her daughter.

There was also her husband’s sister and boyfriend staying at the house and we had a very nice time at lakes/beaches/in little towns/eating ice cream and taking naps.

I didn’t get home until late on Monday night, and Monday just happened to be the first day of school for Edda. Thank you Jeremy for holding down the fort! It’s taken me a while to get back to my routine, but I’m trying!

After picking us up from the airport, we headed to Keene, NH and settled into our airbnb in the middle of town. It’s an old house, which is both great (old wooden floors and lots of charm walking distance to town) and kind of annoying (poor lighting, oddly shaped bathrooms and way not enough plugs). We had dinner at home – with a first stop at the local ice cream place. I’ve tried pretty hard to not eat too much ice cream and cheese while I’m at home, but when I’m on vacation, it’s all ice cream and cheese. Yum.

I’ve been sidelined from exercising regularly this summer with all my poison ivy drama, but I went for a jog/run on this lovely trail straight from the house and the trail was wide enough so I did not have to touch any plants.

On Monday, we went to Dublin, NH where Katherine and Bob were married and went to the town archives (!) and talked to the archivists (!). We found Bob and Katherine’s wedding certificate and Katherine left her book that she wrote about her family with them.

The archivist kindly opened the old one-room schoolhouse where they were setting up an exhibit. This is a bust of Doris Foote, a relative of Katherine’s.

They also had this old bench from a house in town with famous visitors’ signatures carved into the wood including Mark Twain and Amelia Earhart!

We drove by the house where Bob and Katherine were married.

On Tuesday, we drove to the house owned by Katherine’s grandmother and Katherine spent summers in this house with no bathrooms or electricity. It was sold by Katherine’s family to the parents of the current owner. The current owner was out of town, but told us to come and how to get into the house.

The dogs loved running freely from the property which was about a mile off the main road. Elka, especially, loved playing in the woods and high grass.