Author: Doris

This weekend was milder than it has been for weeks it seems like. We brought Elka to the dog park – since her old one closed, we haven’t been in the routine to bring her to the other one yet. It’s still pretty close to the house, it’s just been so cold.

Also, this seems like such a small thing, but I had the gutter people come to clean the gutters out on Saturday (we have so many tall trees around our house, they are always full of leaves and debris, I swear, I could have them cleaned every month forever and they would always be full) and finally, after years of leaf mismanagement (me) and drainage that was clogged from leaf debris and all the drainage exits covered by years of fallen leaves and dirt and unlocatable by me for at least 16 years – I’m like…thank god the water runs from the roof, along the gutters and down through the drains and out the backyard and not straight down next to the foundation of the house. I can see all the exits in the backyard, all the drains have cleanouts and…hooray for things that work. Now, fingers crossed I can keep it all working.

On Sunday, we drove to Wilmington DE to celebrate Katherine’s birthday. Bob had a lovely concert – a trio Beethoven and Brahms. I haven’t seen Bob play a concert in a very long time, so it was so nice to see him perform. Apparently, he thought the piano was too loud, but he is sitting right next to the open grand – so it’s hard for hime to judge. I thought it was well balanced among the three instruments. I forgot my cough drops, I need to remember for any concert, talk or whatever that I need to sit quietly for a long time, there is always I moment I need to uncontrollably cough…for whatever reason. Jeremy saved me with some gum.

Then we went out for a celebratory dinner to celebrate Katherine’s birthday. A small, but lively group. Olivia from NYC, George from Baltimore and Jeremy invited his college pal, Dan.

Katherine wanted a princess cake for her birthday and this is not such an easy cake to find. Olivia kindly brought this one from a NYC bakery – we could not find one in DC. Happy birthday Katherine!

Look at these goofballs. Haha. It’s always fun to catch up with Dan. We did not bring Edda – Eliana was kind enough to stay with her into the evening. Edda, for whatever reason, has been super vocal for about 6 months now. She “talks” all the time, bursting out with vocalizations over sermons, classes, gym sessions, dinner and phone calls. It’s been…difficult to bring her places where she’s supposed to be quiet even though everyone is very gracious and understanding. Thanks to my parents who kept Elka for the day as well. I think there were some meatballs eaten and everyone was happy.

Friday night, I went out to celebrate Kristin’s birthday with a few of her girlfriends – who I did not know. It’s been a long time since I’ve been in this kind of situation, but it was just the four of us and because Kristin is lovely, her friends are also lovely, so funny! We went to Great Sage – a vegan restaurant. Delicious. I came home and Jeremy asked what we talked about and I said – “IUDs, period blood and vasectomies”. Hahahaha. It was a lot of fun for a Friday night! I had a mojito!

This was my tiny present to Kristen. I’m in a weird gift giving mood these days. I’m trying to not add clutter to anyone’s home, because I’m in such a declutting mood for our own house. This is not easy to do.

Nine miles in the cold on the canal at 10:30 min/mile pace on a Wed morning! About a minute per mile slower than I could do about a year ago. About a minute and a half per mile slower than I could do it five years ago, if we go back 10 years, there might have been a week or two in there that I could do it at a whopping 2 min per mile faster. It’s OK, getting older and slower. Does it feel the same? In many ways yes, it doesn’t matter what the long pace is at you can get that worn out feeling that comes from physical labor in the sun and cold, but in other ways, you can’t get it back. Back in the day, sometimes – probably 1 out of 10 runs – you could feel yourself almost flying – like leaping through the strides. Now, I can feel like I’m almost feeling it. Does this make any sense? Good enough. I used to eagerly show up at the canal in the cold and the dark if my days were full and run the workout before other people got out of bed, I’m much, much, much less willing to do that now, if the day is too full, I’ll let the workout go and it’ll be OK. I’m grateful for sure, nothing hurts. Mostly. My joints are stiff when I wake up in the morning – a new thing that started happening this year. I inexplicably slightly dislocated my thumb this week while I was sleeping (!) – I noticed it at 2am, but it had popped back into alignment by the time that I has really woken up at 6 am. It’s still sore about 48 hours later. This old body of mine, grateful for you, please carry me through. I’ll try to take care of you and I hope you’ll take care of me.

It’s been a while. Let’s go – starting the Saturday before Thanksgiving, Megan came by and had dinner with us and hung out. She had just been to a toy modification workshop where to learn to hook up toys to buttons and Edda was thrilled to be her first tester. She loved, loved this monkey which would clap and sing you – you can see the button in Megan’s hand that Edda would push.

We had three sets of guests come and go during thanksgiving week and in order to accommodate them, Jeremy moved his office from one of the bedrooms into our gym. He’s been spending lots of time rearranging things in this room, buying a green screen so he can project an image of his OLD office in this NEW, less pleasing background, office space.

Monday of Thanksgiving week, I ran long at the canal – 1 mile warmup, 9 miles steady – it’s been a long, long time since I’ve done that. And then headed to town center to meet up with Ning, Brian, Noah, Tristan and Mike and Scott who were going to stay at the house until Friday morning. We had brunch at First Watch – a favorite of mine.

What day is this? Wed? Jeremy brings out the turkey(s). Note that in the background is our “standard” setup with the couch in front of the fireplace. Jeremy’s parents arrive during the day.

Wed afternoon, we pay a visit to Scott’s mom and walk around the cemetery with Elka. Scott left flowers, I left an orange. We walked and did some tomb sweeping for other people.

Thursday morning, we move the house around to the “party” configuration. Mike runs out to get ice. We busy ourselves cleaning up. I find our decorative turkey centerpieces.

By four o’clock, the house is bustling. My mom starts off with her famous egg roll appetizers. (Vince didn’t come home, he celebrated with Dani on the left coast and he made egg rolls for their friendsgiving).

I was like – oh, there aren’t going to be kids at the party, but I had pretty much forgotten about the 7 or 8 that showed up.

I want to give us kudos for having a very diverse holiday feast. We had white people, Jewish people, Black people, Asian people and Hispanic people – all the peoples. Are you hungry? Come to our house, we’ll feed you.

So much pie – we even had two frozen pies that we could not bring ourselves to bake. They are saved for another time.

So we had too much food. Turkey sandwiches for days – which I do enjoy. It’s like twice as much food as we needed. We’d never had ham before, but we did it this year, and people devoured it. Maybe it was the only dish that got finished.

So we moved the couch to the old dining room. Now, about this couch – it’s my birthday couch that I bought myself this year to celebrate, not only my birthday, but also that I finished paying for Vince’s college – so proud of myself and I wanted to splurge. So not an IKEA couch, but a Room & Board couch – a step up, an “adult” couch. We’ve only bought one other “adult” couch (from Crate and Barrel) when we were young with two professional jobs and no kids and it still lives – incredibly stained, but sturdy! in one of the upstairs bedrooms. The new couch was delivered in mid-October and immediately, I realized that people LOVE to eat on couches. Like everyone – I even love to eat on couches. And I was nervous about this because…new couch. And then I decided I didn’t want to be that person to tell people to not eat on the new precious couch. Nor did I want to be the person who covered up the couch with plastic and then unveil it for special occasions (which, wouldn’t Thanksgiving count as a special occasion?). So I didn’t tell anyone to not eat on the couch and then I had an entire slew of kids eating chocolate and gravy on the new couch and I tried to not flip out. I’m patiently waiting for the first stains to happen and then I will not care anymore. I realize this is not a very Thanksgiving post, more like a grinch-y post.

There were dog outings.

So we decided to leave the house in party mode for at least this winter season. We are keeping this cozy living room nook. Tian Pei asked for a formal portrait before he left.

Whimsey sat on Edda’s lap for a little while. Katherine and I are both wearing coats given to us from the husbands of our dead friends (long story).

And then everyone was out of the house by Saturday morning. And then I started in on the holiday decorating. We aren’t hosting Xmas here at the house, so sometimes you feel like maybe one doesn’t want to set up the tree and lights. But I’m trying to declutter enough that the only stuff in storage is Christmas stuff and so, if I’m going to store it, I want to use it too. And the lights are very pretty and the ornaments are sentimental. I know there is a thing where there is more than one tree in the house and that the “pretty” tree is on display and the “family” tree tucked away in a playroom or bedroom, but I’m a one tree kind of girl. Also, I love our tree from 2006, we had to go through the middle years where it seem old and out of fashion and now I think we are firmly in its vintage era which makes me happy. It’s not old, it’s vintage!

Always, so thankful for everything. With love to you all.

I’m scrolling less and reading more these days. I’m listening to Tom Lake by Ann Patchett narrated by Meryl Streep and it is a sunny afternoon in the park with your favorite people and snacks. Ann Patchett is one of my favorite authors, this story about a friend dying of cancer is so moving, Ann has a way of describing everyday things in such beautiful language, I could just – I dunno – die. Like EB White or gah, I can’t remember this other writer – New Yorker, ohh Calvin Trillin – all beautiful writers. They all use regular words in regular sentences, but their observations, turn of phrase always take my breath away. Some people just are magical at what they do, they take what they have and turn it into a delight – food, song, art, writing, math, science, conversation, dancing! How can I forget dance? You have youtube now, so you can see all the way people dance from your living room, but I saw Bill T Jones at Harvard in the early 1990s and could not believe that people moved their bodies in that way – captivating and undulating and together and apart.

I’m loving listening to the book – not really because of Ann because I expected the language I’ve come to love from her – but because of Meryl Streep who has completely dazzled and surprised me. I know people love her and marvel at her, but I’ve never been taken by her acting and her latest stints in the in Mama Mia films have left me wondering – but she is an amazing, amazing voice actor and I could listen to her forever. I don’t want to listen too much because I don’t want it to be over and then I’ll have to find another book so comforting to listen to.

I’m also reading (in print) a Japanese novel called the Devotion of Suspect X which is an interesting murder mystery and you know who did it from the first chapter and then you follow the investigation from both perspectives – from the detectives trying to figure it out and the murderer(s) who are trying to hide it. I’ve been reading it with the reddit bookclub, it keeps me on schedule and introduces me to books I would have never picked up.

We spent last night at Friendsgiving at Main Street which kicked off our holiday festivities. We are going to rent this space for Edda’s birthday party (March 22, be there or be square) – it’s not usually set up for sit down meals, but it was nice to see how it could be. And we are hoping to invite lots of our Main Street Friends to come have pancakes with us.

Emilina came, she’s a member of the community now.

We had to write down a person we are grateful for, a place we are grateful for and a thing that we are grateful for. Jeremy did it in less than 5 seconds. Here’s what he wrote: Doris, home, my bike. Lol. Then I did feel some pressure to list him as my person.

So nice to see friends – I’m so terrible, I can’t remember anyone’s name if I don’t see them every day. So I wear a nametag myself in case anyone is wondering my name.

My mom turned 83 yesterday and to celebrate, we went alllll the way downtown to Dupont Circle to the Pembroke restaurant. This is a restaurant on the first floor of a hotel, and I had forgotten, but Jeremy had a work Christmas party at the hotel years ago which was a lot of fun and quite fancy. As we don’t often go downtown for anything anymore, it was quite an adventure (the city is starting to be dressed up for Christmas) and the restaurant was lively and fun – the food good and the service lovely. We had an early reservation – just like we like it, and it was very quiet when we were first seated, but by the time we left, the restaurant was humming, not a full capacity, but enough hubbub to feel festive. I’m always a little nervous that the food/atmosphere would not be worth the drive, but the Pembroke delivered.

My lovely mom enjoying the bone marrow appetizer:

The little fried donut birthday dessert, which was puffy, light, not too sweet and so yummy.

I’m battling spider mites on my houseplants. A few weeks ago, I found some on the ficus in Jeremy’s office. I put it in the bathtub and sprayed it down with a mixture of water/rubbing alcohol/soap per my favorite website, reddit. Yesterday, I noticed that my monstera had some yellowing leaves and I was like, huh. I wonder what is wrong with it and what was wrong with it was that it also had spider mites. I immediately put that one outside in the compost pile. I really just can’t deal. The monstera and the ficus were nowhere near each other. The ficus was in a room by itself, but the monstera was in the front hallway with about 10 other lovely (but probably now infected) houseplants. I’m a sad plant-y person this morning. But I was watching one of my favorite plant youtubers (benjiplant) and he has such a nice ASMR voice and told me, it’s just part of the process…so I’m processing.

Jeremy bought an EV charger to be delivered to the house so his parents can charge their car when they visit for thanksgiving. Here’s its 4 pronged plug.

And here is the three prong outlet so lovingly installed a few months ago. Hmmm, not quite right. Electrician is coming today at 9 to help us out.

Construction / drainage repair is still going on in the yard… I didn’t realize it was going to take this long or honestly, be this nice. The weather has been mild for the crew, which I guess is great. It rained a lot last night for the first time in months and Jeremy reports that all the newly installed drainage works great. We have a lot of leaves in the gutters, so I’m paranoid that the drainage will instantly get clogged again. I think the crew also tried to kill the gopher in the front yard. We’ll see, I think gophers are pretty smart.

My blog now can generate AI photos. This makes me sad, AI makes me sad. Anyways, here’s “pokemon on a towel in a luxury bathroom on Mars”. Not quite what I was imagining, but impressive nonetheless. What’s with the cartoon wings on the towel? Why is the towel standing up? Who keeps pens in the bathroom?

Alex came by yesterday to do lucky trades with us in Pokemon Go. He knows all the ins/outs of the game, I just hand him my phone and he trades, changes some moves on some of my pokemon and powers them up. And then I take my phone back from him and I have a super new “strong” pokemon. Gotta catch them all!

I’m like – not reading any news – no NYT, no WaPo, no NPR, no random social media influencers telling me to buy Athletic Greens. It doesn’t come very naturally, I’m always “just about to check” because my phone is my best friend and an extension of my hand practically and then I remind myself to not do it. It’s very weird. My life is so….quiet. It’s like I’m back in 1990 – but with texting. It opens up this vast time of…boredom that you have to fill somehow. A skill to relearn…

Busy weekend – we had dinner with my parents, who are back from the west coast, at the house on Friday night, chinese takeout. On Saturday, I had a guitar lesson and hung out with Megan for a bit on Saturday afternoon. Sunday, we went olympic weightlifting where I’m still practicing my cleans and later in the day we spoke with Felix who is most likely going to be living with us next year. Sunday dinner was cancelled because folks are – sick, recovering from surgery and/or out of town. As these things go….

I get melancholy during the run up to the holidays and probably through the holidays themselves. Such an emphasis on family fun, happiness and gratefulness, I’m always on the grinch-y side. It doesn’t help, the darkening days and the unfortunate state of the world. One can’t help feeling like one spent all this time building a beautiful diorama out of construction paper, pinecones, popsicle sticks and then having people walk by, stomp all over it and then call you an idiot and then walk away leaving you bewildered. And these are people who are supposed to be your friends, family or neighbors. Besides the stomping, this time of year, I always miss people who are no longer in my life for various reasons and feel sorry for myself.

Anyways, I turn back to my own diorama. I’ve long turned to nature – look at my venus fly trap, happily making new red tinged traps – ready for the errant fly in our warming winters – to come by.

Jeremy has turned to modest home repairs, putting in a timer for our bathroom vent.

I’ve filled my life with music and fiber arts. I’m singing and playing the guitar regularly – badly and off key all the time. But it’s OK, right and also doing a crochet blanket that will take a lifetime. It’s OK if it takes a lifetime. And we move on.

The new driveway is poured and looks great. The crew is very kind and they made this temporary ramp for Edda to access the house while the driveway cures and hardens.

There is a large gopher hole in my front lawn. It was there early in the spring, but now it’s larger and part of the front lawn in caving in – I think I’m going to have to kill this gopher which already makes me sad. I’m trying to urge them to move like a quarter mile away into the woods where they can make as many burrows as they want to, but I’m not sure they are going to listen to me.