I went to my church yesterday for the first time in over a decade. It’s the UU church down the street and I still maintain my membership because if I did have to pick a church, it would be this one and generally speaking, I’d like my ashes scattered there (half there and half in Big Basin, that beautiful space where you can really feel god), unless Georgetown Medical School takes my body for Anatomy 101, and if so, I’d like a space in their cemetery which they do offer for bodily donations. It was interesting to see the changes that have happened since the pandemic, it’s now completely set up to have each service broadcast live. You can see there are two large screen flanking the stage and the seats are angled in such a way that the default is looking at the screens – which I did not like very much. Even though I’ve been gone a long time, people did recognize me and say hello and welcomed me back.
I have to say that even though I still give money to this church and generally speaking, I do endorse their philosophies, I have a tough time with any organized religion these days. I much prefer spending my time out in the community living out my true values rather than sitting in church. They say they honor diversity and inclusivity, yet, remains overwhelmingly white and straight – which I don’t feel like exists when I’m out in my local community anywhere else I live my life. But I did feel quite moved by the sermon and I’m happy that I went and participated and saw what was going on.
Also, selfishly, I went because I won an item at their annual online silent auction – this beautiful Zuni (I know, I know) bracelet which was bought in the 70s and never worn. And I, surprisingly, love it very much. The photo on the website was very dark and blurry, and one can never really tell how much one loves jewelry until you wear it and sometimes even then not for a while, but I’m enchanted.
Ugh. I have to admit that I spend most of my life in predominantly white spaces – work, volunteer, and community. Our community is mostly white, but there are pockets of non-white communities and I’ve found it hard to make inroads of friendship in those communities. But these are all excuses and this post was a good reminder to me that I can do better.