Last night, Aunt Liz called for the first time in 5 years. To be honest, I was real surprised. She was very interested and concerned about my current situations. We talked about 10 minutes. So far, she has tried to avoid me about 5 years right after grandmom’s death. The reason, I guess, was very simple. I disagreed with her about the way of handling the situation with grandmom. I thought we should let her go peacefully. I guessed she felt terrible that I was not on her side during the heated discussions among our siblings. You know, of course not everytime, all the time, people should agree with you. Even, wife and husband, sometimes can not agree on something. But, the big picture is that there are other things beside this need to be taken of. What a wasteful 5 years? I am glad she can forget and forgive.
Again, during the heated discussions about grandmom, I was pointing out that Uncle Robert would not make any decision on how to handle grandmom situations even though he had grandmom’s written will that he was the sole one to decide. I am complaining that if he promised grandmom of anything, he should definitely take the responsibility to do just that. Well, after that, that was absolutely no communication between us. He even turned down politely my suggested visit to him back at the time that there was a Martin’s family re-union in New Mexico. I think this one will drag on for more than 5 years. Hope, it is short though.
The lesson, I am trying to pass on to those having our genes, is that please don’t just let one thing (or couple of things) stands in the way to ruin everything else. Our family traits have the tendency to do just that. Understanding, flexibility and communication are the key. No two people think alike, act alike. There are a lot of other areas, beside one or two things, that common good & interests should bring people together, not to agree, but at least to work together of getting satisfied solutions for everyone involved.
Time is up. I need to go downstairs doing exercise.