Feeling incompetent.


I tried to do some errands today, simple ones like buying spaghetti sauce and black bean soup, but I failed at this task.  The shelves are still empty at the local Target. This mid-day failure set me up for the rest of the afternoon, like setting up a the T-ball stand and just knowing you are going to whiff the next swing.

Though between my feelings of failure, I did have an excellent ox tail for lunch.


My second feeling of failure came from attempting and failing to make an ortho appointment for Edda’s back at Johns Hopkins.  This has been on my list for many months, but I’ve been putting it off because I like to be in denial.  I called the Hopkins # – they said they need a referral in order to make the appointment.  I called my primary care physician – they said they don’t do open ended referrals, they need the exact time/date of the appointment to make the referral.  I called back Hopkins, they said they *really* didn’t make appointments without the referral.  They suggested I change primary care physicians.  Sigh.  In the end, I got the two of them to talk to each other!  Success.  Kind of.  The primary called me back and said – who diagnosed her?  we have nothing on the chart that says she has scoliosis.  I admitted that I diagnosed her.  (I know, I’m not an expert or anything, but I can tell with my eye/fingers when things are two inches off center.)  Primary says – I gotta check with the doc.  I said I was willing to come in so they can see Edda’s back and also that I feel like I needed to compensate them for all this phone tag I’m making them do.  Anyways, primary called back and said  everything was straightened out (ha ha scoliosis pun) and all I had to do was call Hopkins again.  (This is such a boring story.  In the hands of a better writer, I know this could be riveting.)

So I call Hopkins back.  I can’t make the appointment because they can’t find the referral.

Argh.  AAAAHHHHHHHHH~!!!!!1!@@!$@#R$%^$%^.  I give up.

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