Why you should not pick me as a roommate in quarantine.

  • I’m messy.
  • I eat food everywhere.
  • I leave clothes everywhere.
  • I’m not funny.
  • I often use a new towel each time I bathe, even though I try to reuse them. I can’t find the old ones!
  • I’m bad at recycling.
  • I leave cabinets open and lights on.
  • I leave many glasses of water all over the house.
  • I will throw your things away without telling you if I deem them without use anymore.
  • In moments of stress, I become selfish and want it all for me. And not for you.
  • I don’t like to brush my teeth.
  • I work in a hospital.
  • I get anxious and I will have to tell you about my anxiety in order to release it.
  • I play white person music all the time.
  • I like AMSR.
  • I frequently pay the utility bills late (because I forget! not on purpose) and therefore we are almost always on the verge of having something turned off.
  • I don’t wash my hands well.
  • I will get annoyed at your habits. I won’t yell. But I’ll be really, really nice to you and you will know I’m mad at you.
  • I hide treats.
  • I will look at my phone and ignore you as you are speaking in front of me.
  • I will not help with the children’s schoolwork.

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