Angry

I’ve been so unusually angry for months now. Snippy and reactive, not really my usual self. Little things set me off – conversations that I’d have with Jeremy or Vickey – (mostly Jeremy, poor Jeremy) I thought it might have been that I was working too much, or that I was burned out from the nursing. Every little thing seemed like such a mountain to climb. Did I feel this way before the pandemic? So I backed off of so many things Q4 – quit the nursing job, went part time at the patent job, stopped exercising/training so vigorously (basically stopped doing workouts and running so long, but still exercising regularly for movement). Basically, whatever I was doing, I cut back 50-60% and left room for resting. So I baked and had weekends free since October now. But I’m still pissy and I still can’t quite understand it. I think it’s a mix of recovering from the pandemic (which included the regular pandemic stuff, working professionally in a hospital, and seeing Alice through her cancer/hospice/death) overlaid with becoming menopausal during the same time. I had a hot flash last night – unusual, I had my hot flashes summer of 2019 and it’s been a quiet menopause transition since then. No complaints. Am I snippy now because I’m not working enough? I don’t know! Going back to full time at my desk job at the end of January.

My favorite thrift store closed! Grrr. (ha ha just kidding. not mad at this.)

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