On Friday in the Napa Valley, Jeremy went on an early morning bike ride. Up another mountain – again now the details are fuzzy. Very foggy and slightly damp.
We had a late breakfast at a diner in the town of Calistoga and then headed to the town of Napa to do some sightseeing and shopping. One of our goals was to get a good family photo. Edda can be fickle and gives side eye to our attempts.
So we joined in on the grump fest for a few photos.
In the town of Napa, we went walking and went into a few stores. Honestly, the tasting rooms were a bit intimidating and though we were there to buy some wine, we hesitated to walk into them. Edda had a nice time. We played Pokemon Go as a family.
We came back to the hotel in the afternoon and I camped out at the pool and enjoyed people watching. There was the girls weekend, the young family with the dad and the 2nd wife, the honeymooning couple. I don’t spend time at the pool usually and the world has moved without me and everyone wears a bikini from the 12 year old to the 65 year old (except me!). For dinner, we went to Lovina, which is a tip-free restaurant, where the price on the menu includes health insurance, 401K, and vacation for the staff. We sat down and started in on the meal, and we started going down a TiK tok rabbit hole of funny animal videos and so we agreed to put all our phones on the table and talk to each other as if we liked each other (which we do).
The food was good, but again, Jeremy’s cooking has kind of ruined this kind of restaurant for me, but we enjoyed ordering all different dishes and passing the plates among us to try the different meals. The servings were generous, we were able to box them to eat for breakfast the next morning.
Another attempt at a family photo.
The next morning, we packed up relatively early and dropped Vince back off at Davis and then drove to Klamath Falls to visit Emy and Seth. Bob and Katherine were flying in that day as well from New Mexico. On the way to Klamath, we stopped at the town of Dorris and took a few photos and I was able to thrift some sweatshirts from the side of the road which have been lifesavers because I forgot to pack enough warm clothing and we were heading towards a place that gets to be 40 or 50 degrees at night.
Wed was our last full day in Berkeley. I’m not sure what we did – Jeremy biked up another hill which now I’ve forgotten the details.
I hung out at home and worked a bit, but really, I did not do very much. In the afternoon, Jeremy started packing our stuff (which takes a few hours at least) and I went to a laundromat and did some laundry. That evening, Jeremy made the most delicious salmon dinner – really comparable to any high end restaurant entree. We had the sourdough from the Cheese Board and I think I’ve never had a more delicious dinner. We still hung out in our backyard and enjoyed the beautiful evening outdoor weather.
The next morning, we did some last minute packing and were getting ready to send a very apologetic email to the airbnb host telling her that we accidentally broke a light fixture and that the replacement was slated to be delivered to the house that afternoon (I couldn’t bear to pay the extra $50 for next day shipping, but had paid the extra $15 for 3 day shipping, but I counted the three business days wrong because…I’m lame that way), but about 30 minutes before we left, the FedEx truck pulled up with the package and we were able to hush hush replace the fixture without anyone knowing (hopefully – fingers crossed) and did not send any email to our host. I asked that we go to the amazing dog park again and let Elka run around in her happy place.
Then we drove to Davis to pick Vince up to do the very short and fancy part of the trip, our couple of days in Napa. Vince took us to an Indian food place for lunch which was very delicious. Because Jeremy is such an excellent cook of many classic dishes, my main desire for eating out is cheap hole in the wall ethnic foods which this lunch was a prime example of.
We drove about 90 minutes to Napa using winding roads and areas which had been through forest fires a few years ago. We drove through lots of vineyards to our hotel in Calistoga. I know that vacations, even very beautiful and expensive ones, can be stressful and fraught with expectations and timing and competing desires, so I’m always trying to be gentle with me and all my fellow travelers. There are lots of needs to look out for so we don’t get too grumpy with each other. The first one is that Vince gets his own room which took me a long time to get used to because, all four of us could technically fit into one room and I can be cheap in certain ways which include spending money on “unnecessary” hotel rooms. But it’s hard with all of us essentially having different sleep (Edda first at 8 pm, us next at 10 pm and Vince last at who knows what time) and wake up times (Edda first or second at 5 am or 7 am, Jeremy next at 6 am, me next at 6:30 am and Vince at 10 am?) and different habits (Jeremy out at 6:30 am for a bike ride, Edda having breakfast at 7 am, Doris on a work call at 8 am, etc, etc.). So Vince got his own room (which we booked with an accessible shower which Edda has already enjoyed) and Edda shares with us.
I went to the pool in the afternoon on Thursday while everyone else took a nap and/or researched bike routes or whatever they do (maybe watch TikTok). Then we went to the restaurant at the hotel where we, tyros at wine appreciation, ordered a flight of white wine. We promptly forgot which one was which after the server carefully placed them in order and explained to us each type and then we decided that all of them pretty much taste exactly the same. We tried all the different ways of tasting the difference including clearing our palates, we tried closing our eyes and really concentrated on the taste. Haha, nonetheless, they were enjoyable and tasty. Wine appreciation is lost on us – maybe tonight we’ll try a red flight. We won’t try the real kicker which is that blindfolded even true wine connoisseurs can’t really tell red from white.
Don’t lick your sister.
Katherine asked for a family photo which we are attempting to do during the few days that we are together. We are not very good at this. The first time I mentioned this at dinner, Vince was like ummm, I have only this t-shirt to wear and didn’t bring any nice clothes. But no matter. We tried! We’ll keep trying. This was a not very good first attempt. That chair does nothing for Edda and it looks like I’m strangling the dog, but other than that, it’s perfect.
We walked to town which is about a half mile down the road to go looking for some ice cream (which we found) and we also found the beautiful labyrinth on the way. Vince and I both reached nirvana, but Elka, she broke all the rules and crossed the lines, I’m not sure it counted for her.
On Monday, we both worked essentially a full day at work. Jeremy went into the Berkeley office, I worked from our rented airbnb. Vince, in the meantime, after spending the weekend with Dani (who had commuted from Livermore back to Irvine), made his way via train towards us in Berkeley. We were able to book him a seat on the Coast Starlight so he could see the California coastline and we could get photos of his train ride (we’ve never been).
We did not know that they had meal service, but Vince found out and got himself a dinner reservation.
Who knew you could get steak on a train?
We had initially booked him the ticket to drop him off at Davis because we had rented only a two bedroom house and thought we wouldn’t make the trip to Davis until we needed to leave Berkeley on Thursday, but it turned out that Vince kind of really wanted the stuff that we carted from SoCal and then logically that would be easier to get off earlier from the train near Berkeley at 9:30 ish Monday night and stay with us that night and have us drop him off at Davis later the next day. So we moved Edda into our room (damn, she makes a lot of noise at night and the entire room was filled with bed and she tipped herself off the side of her bed so she ended up being wedged between her bed and the dresser. Jeremy and I unwedged her as she remained asleep and unaware our sleepy girl) and gave Vince Edda’s old room.
The next day was our 25th wedding anniversary and I had the best day of doing bits of what we do everyday and enjoying having everyone around. I worked a few hours Tuesday morning. Vince and Jeremy went out on a morning walk to get fancy coffee. Jeremy got a muffin with a soft boiled egg in the middle of it. Vince got some sort of weird seasonal coffee with two shots and watermelon juice.
They got me some flowers on the way home and had bought me an almond blueberry muffin which I ate after my meetings concluded.
Then I got to spend midday with Vince. We went to downtown Berkeley where we went to three independent bookstores and bought books and had a nice lunch at a little outdoor bistro. We went to see the outside of Chez Panisse and also bought a loaf of bread at the Cheese Board. Then after Jeremy finished his early afternoon meeting, he came to pick us up and then all of us drove to Davis to drop Vince and his stuff off at his apartment.
Then we came back to Berkeley. We had contemplated making a dinner reservation somewhere, but we decided to have grilled tomato and cheese sandwiches, a salad and nice dessert and enjoy the backyard of the rental.
Edda was very excited about this plan.
Jeremy made the most perfect sandwiches.
I had some bubbly kombucha which was…odd, but celebratory.
The three of us enjoyed an entire fruit tart and it was a very nice celebration. I’m the luckiest, really. I do not know how I got so lucky to have met Jeremy and have this wonderful life together. I’m so lucky that I had my whole family together on our anniversary and that we had a very nice day together doing all the things we like doing with and for each other. 25 years is a long time, here’s to another 25 years.
Saturday morning, Jeremy went biking with Jimmy on a hilly route that Jimmy decided on. 30 miles? Maybe 40 miles? Then they came home and we headed to the same beer garden for lunch that we had had the nachos at, lol. It’s within walking distance of the house, what can I say? This time, we did not have any drinks or nachos and settled on sandwiches (which were very good!)
After Jimmy headed off, we went to a local dog park which is an enormous island so we could walk while Elka trotted off leash to meet doggie friends and then catch up to us. It was a new experience for all of us this walking/following off leash – very very fun. Elka met new friends. Kudos to Jeremy who pushed Edda on the bumpy path. It was a beautiful day. It’s been pretty marvelous weather on our vacation and I do not take that for granted at all.
We were encouraged that some dogs were swimming and were hoping that they would teach Elka to swim. She went into the water until chest deep which is further than she’d ever gone before, but no actual swimming. We’d have to come back more often, but we can not.
Sunday morning, we headed to Fremont to see our friend from grad school, Litian. She was interested in meeting Elka, so that was fun.
While I was hanging out with Litain, Jeremy proceeded to San Jose where he climbed up Mt. Hamilton. Meanwhile, Litian and I had a lovely wide ranging conversation in which I may have encouraged her to try the Unitarian Church and we did a load of laundry together.
Once the load was in the dryer, we went to a dog park close to Litian’s house. The bay area loves its dogs. We met some nice doggies and I tried to convince Litian to get a dog because the dog park is literally 2 minutes from her house. After the dog park, we came home and rested a bit until Jeremy came back from his bike ride. During my little rest, I received a call from a California number and thought to myself – oh no, Elka is on the lam again. And sure enough, she found a way out of the house/yard and found another very nice family down the street to hang out with (so cute! they said when they returned her).
Litian made a wonderful homemade Chinese lunch and we all enjoyed hanging out and then Ding, her husband who had come home around the same time as Jeremy, had many questions about the dog – do they get sick? are vets expensive? and then I encouraged him to walk Elka. So he took her down the block and returned and said – it almost felt like she was my dog. Haha. Elka is everyone’s dog apparently.
After lunch, we drove home, and then hosted an early evening dinner in our airbnb’s backyard with Jeremy’s high school friends Ben and Steve and Ben’s son Sam and Steve’s wife Tienne. It was a nice evening with Mexican food and lots of laughing and lots of serious talk too. It’s impressive to me, these old friends, who’ve known each other for so, so long. Longer than my marriage.
Friday was our first full day in Berkeley. Jeremy made a nice breakfast for Edda while I went out for a run. There is a nice pedestrian trail that runs alongside the bart train not far from the house.
Jeremy spent Thursday night going to the grocery store and stocking up the fridge and setting up our work stations. Mine is at the end of the dining room table. We did an airbnb in Berkeley/Albany – two bedroom, 1 full bath house.
Jeremy went for a bike ride across the bridge to Marin. I got irritated with him because he went longer than he said that he would – I thought he’d get home in time to help shower Edda and have lunch together, but we had a miscommunication. But now we are 25 years into the marriage – we straightened it out with only a bit of discussion (and an I’m sorry cookie) and all was well again. He also managed to shatter a light fixture in this house by moving his bike around in the air in the kitchen. Whoops. We ordered a replacement that will suffice (I hope, we’ll see.)
Jeremy’s friend from UCS came over with her dog at 1pm and they went for a doggie walk for about an hour and came home. The dogs and people set up in the backyard and I went for a walk to the local yarn store where I bought yarn made by a small farm in Petaluma, CA who employs people with disabilities.
I came back by three pm or so and we finally were able to give Edda a shower It’s a 2 person activity (3 if you count Edda) when we travel because we don’t have our regular set up – all three of us in the shower together. And then we all headed out to a beer garden (which I had admired on my run that morning) to host a happy hour that Jeremy had set up with his work. Doggies welcome.
We had nachos for dinner and a lime drink (I forget the name of it). Look at those crazy nachos. Only one person showed up (which was pretty much what we expected – everyone is remote now and Jeremy’s work generally has summer Fridays off so who was going to come? the one person who lives two blocks away), who was super lovely and we had a great time.
Then we came home and had ice cream (again) and had a quiet evening and went to bed. Do we have any photos of friends? No! oh well.
On Tuesday, we mostly worked during the day, but in the evening after dinner, Jeremy drove towards San Diego and found a cheap hotel to stay at and spent the night so in the morning, he could bike up Mt. Palomar. He spent a couple of hours doing that, and then drove to UC Irvine to have lunch with Vince and pick up some bags/luggage and Vince’s bike to drive up to northern California. Vince stayed at UCI to finish off his final week at his internship.
Meanwhile, Elka, Edda and I spent the time in LA with Julia. I watched an episode of Endeavor with Julia (a murder mystery on PBS) which was a lot of fun, 90 minutes (!) and we asked each other questions during the confusing parts, lol. Elka loves being a California dog. Spending so much time outside in Julia’s yard, sleeping in the sun, sleeping in the shade, chasing squirrels. Saying hello to various visitors. It quite agrees with her.
Wed night was the last night in LA, we went to Lunetta for dinner and then to Rori’s for ice cream.
Thursday morning, we repacked the van with Jeremy’s bike, our luggage, Vince’s bike, Vince’s luggage. It was a tight squeeze. Jeremy was, at times, thinking it wouldn’t work out, but it did. We do not travel light. We have three full sized monitors, three laptops, a wheelchair, an inflatable bed/crib. Nine packs of diapers, a guitar (I probably shouldn’t have brought that, I’m knitting rather than playing guitar which is much smaller). And dog food and a dog bed.
We had to mount Vince’s bike on the back with this suction cup device which did hold onto the bike on Interstate 5. It seems very precarious, but it held and did not go flying off and Jeremy thought it probably didn’t increase our fuel consumption very much. Everything gets more and more complicated. 1. Edda can’t move very well and needs a relatively spacious bathroom to be changed and cannot be left alone 2. Elka can neither be left in the car, no go into stores/restaurants 3. the van can not be left out of sight, lest someone steal the bike.
We said bye to Julia and thanked her for sharing her space with us. We had a great time. The rest of the trip, we are paying for our lodging, staying near friends, but not with them.
We had lunch at a drive through McDonald’s and then met up with Vince’s partner Dani who is finishing up her summer internship tomorrow. We managed to go to an ice cream parlor where we could sit outside with the dog and keep an eye on the van and have ice cream. And we had a great time with Dani. It’s the first time I’ve met them, Jeremy has met them once before when he was out on a business trip to Sacramento.
They went to an arts high school and love to draw, so we got to see a bunch of their work. I’m not quite sure when we’ll see each other next, maybe at graduation? Then we headed to our rental for the next week in Berkeley.
Sunday was the main day of tropical storm Hilary. Our part of LA did not see widespread flooding, though the streets did have large puddles near the curbs (about 4-6 inches deep in places) and it was a heavy east coast-type rain. We spent the day inside – I repaired a toilet. We worked. Jeremy excitedly told me about a “lull” in the rain and I went for a run and the lull lasted for exactly half my run.
Monday, the rain stopped by morning and by noon, the sun was out drying everything and Jeremy went for a local bike ride in the early afternoon. Late afternoon, we went to see our friend Ruth and realized her part of LA had turned into Thai Town. So we went out to have…Thai food at 4:30 in the afternoon. I realized it was a little early to head back home, so I suggested that we go to Caltech (which is where Jeremy and Ruth met each other).
So a lot of LA (while insanely expensive) seems kind of dumpy and trashy and smells a lot like a urinal, once we got to Pasadena (also insanely expensive), it smelled the exact opposite of pee and was not dumpy at all. It smelled like the inside of a spa – eucalyptus. We went to the spot that we first kissed (which has not been torn down…yet) and kissed again, though this time with Ruth and Edda watching and so was a bit embarrassing, but also sentimental. Look at us goobers post kiss.
There is no other person I’d rather stumble through life with and though I did not enjoy grad school, it was 1000% worth it to have met Jeremy.
We were thinking that we’d be lock out of the lab, but as we were pulling on the door, someone saw us from the inside and let us into the building. We went to the 2nd floor (the professors’ floor) and even after all these years, I don’t want to go to the 2nd floor! It gives me the heebie jeebies. Blech. But it was 7 pm on Monday night in late August. Who could possibly be there?
Haha, there are too many Nobel Laureates on campus, so all you get is a small sticker.
We saw the (presumed) descendants of the turtles that kept us company many years ago. And then we walked to…ice cream. Of course. I’ve eaten ice cream almost everyday of this vacation. That’s how you can tell it’s a vacation.
And I finished a hat! Woo hoo. Tuesday we both worked! Meetings all day. Jeremy had a presentation and everything, so he booked a coworking space about a mile away.
It is Sunday morning and it is raining in LA. We are experiencing the effects of Hurricane Hilary here on the west coast. I just seems like regular east coast rain so far. Nothing too dramatic.
Friday morning, Jeremy left early to bike Mt Wilson. This was a challenging ride, a steep grade and a terribly, gravely route. Only 10 miles, but he got to the top – he declared it to be the slowest 10 miles ever. Because it was such a steep grade and he is careful – the way down was just as treacherous and slow. Nothing hurt the next day except for his shoulders.
I’m very much enjoying this trip, but there are tensions that need to be worked out as with all vacations, except the ones were you go on by yourself. Then you only argue with yourself, I guess. Jeremy had spent from about 5:30 am until 1:30 pm biking. This long trip was really based on the fact that Jeremy had a ton of vacation (I know, a very first world problem) that he needed to use up. So we hatched this plan where he was going to bike all over the US and we were going to see friends which has been great and I fully bought into the plan. But then he gets self conscious that maybe he’s taking too much time of the vacation for his own purposes. Remember – if he goes biking, I have Edda with me and, though we are good company for each other, it can be not exactly vacation. Then he wants to talk about my “goals” for the vacation and I really have none, except to keep him company, but then he gets anxious that we are only doing what he wants, etc. etc. But as he wants to talk about it more, I think about it more and get more grumpy about it, even though when he was on the actual bike ride, I was happily knitting, napping or reading a book. So then I have to make up some goals to balance out the vacation. So my made up goals are 1. to see the Barbie movie 2. to go buy some yarn 3. that he should take me out to get a beautiful pastry everyday 4. find a capybara to see, 5. to exercise everyday.
So we went to Century City Mall to buy a Rolex – nah. Just kidding. We bought a beautiful pastry that we split three ways.
It is a beautiful mall. Outdoor, but shady. High end and great people watching. We didn’t bring Elka, but we could have. I’m slowly realizing that dogs are semi-welcomed in stores – we see them everywhere. We played Pokemon Go. I bought a shirt from Zara marked down from $50 to $10.
We are grateful to Julia for sharing her space with us for this time. We are doing some minor house things. Jeremy cooks most nights. I’m enjoying pruning this lemon tree (it smells so great when I’m tucked inside the tree). Edda broke a toilet seat, so that needs repairing during the storm (the toilet is also leaking, which I’m looking forward to fixing).
Julia has a roommate – Victor who has developed a nice friendship with Elka. Elka spends her time in the outdoor courtyard space chasing all the squirrels who are bold enough to steal persimmons. And Elka enjoys eating the persimmons that fall to the ground.
On Saturday, we headed to Santa Monica where we went to a Mexican bakery and had a snack at 11 am. And we bought some yarn at a yarn shop.
We had lunch with Tasha and her family.
And walked to the Santa Monica pier – a beautiful day!
Then we went to Ace Hardware to buy a toilet seat. I was carrying the broken toilet seat and a woman in the parking lot laughed and said – the storm is coming and you are prepping by buying a new toilet! Fantastic! we drove by Jeremy’s old house and discovered that it was in the process of being torn down for a new development. But the tree that Katherine planted it still there in all its glory. Fingers crossed it gets to stay there!
We booked Elka a doggie day care date for the day that we were going to be about 12 hours away from home. This is the 2nd time we’ve used Rover.com – the first time was in Philly when Edda had a neurologist appointment at CHOP and we were on the way to Bob and Katherine’s house. Ashley (who was about a mile away from where we were staying here in LA) took care of Elka for the day – there were two other doggies at her house – I got videos of Elka playing with the other dogs and snuggling with Ashley. It was unclear if Elka even missed us.
Elka finally got to get on someone’s bed at the sitter’s house. We’ve been enforcing no getting on furniture on this trip (and Elka is good about this) because some of our air B&Bs don’t want the dog on the furniture, but we miss a good snuggle in the bed in the evening and in the mornings.
On Tuesday – we both worked a lot of the day (at least in the morning) and puttered around the house in the afternoon. On Wed, Jeremy went for a bike ride and what did I do? A lot of nothing. Napped.
I knit another hat.
Wed night, we walked to Culver City for exploring – less than a mile away. It’s a spot that is hip now even though the name makes it sound very boring. So, even though there are sidewalks, LA is not made for walking – and even less so with a wheelchair. A lot of sidewalks don’t have curb cuts and they are uneven from tree root growth. And there are homeless encampments underneath freeway overpasses – so besides that, it was totally OK! Haha. Yeah, it was a bit tough. Once we made it to Culver City, the sidewalk population exploded and there was very little sidewalk space for anyone – though usually folks easily parted ways to make way for Edda. (It was kind of a free-drink night where all the restaurants made drinks and gave out like 20 mL for free and you had a card and you could collect them all! I failed to get a card even though I tried, the lines were too long). We planned to eat at the Shake Shack (I know, not very original) and get ice cream afterwards.
We found the highest end grocery store – Erewhon and went inside to explore since Jeremy lives for and loves grocery stores. I thought we’d by a reusable bag for a mement0 – how much could it possibly be? Well it could be $50! We passed on it.
Their soup section – all handmade and in glass jars:
Not a single radish out of place. Jeremy said – there is a person whose job it is to constantly rearrange everything so it looks fabulous all the time. It’s a perfect job for someone who is a little OCD.
Then we made it to Salt and Straw for ice cream. Dave highly recommended it – and the ice cream was very good – but it is a little weird. They have seasonal flavors like fried chicken and potato salad. They consider a “normal” flavor to be honey lavender which is too bougie to be a regular flavor. Jeremy loves ice cream with peanut butter – they didn’t have any flavor with PB except a vegan one which he wasn’t about t0 try. I always look for strawberry – but also not a flavor they carry. I ate the seasonal sour cherry pie (delicious!).
On Thursday, we braved the LA traffic to spend the day with Vince who is at UC Irvine for his summer program.
Jeremy wore his UC Davis Aggie shirt and got some funny comments all day about it. We saw anteaters and posed with them.
Vince all dressed up in front of the conference hall in his nice suit jacket.
It was like an adult science fair (all the undergrads who had a summer program presented posters). Here’s Vince telling us about his project. It is so weirdly close to the work my lab did like 30 years ago – it’s both familiar and strange to me at the same time. So much more computer stuff and now you can tweak proteins anyway you want them. Before, we struggled so much with all this stuff.
After his poster session, he still had talks and lunch to attend. We were let loose on campus. We ate lunch at the very nice shopping center across the street and wandered around the buildings waiting for Vince. The student center seemed like a very new building but it had weird handicapped access with ramps tucked in here and there and elevators not where you expected them to be and this crazy wheelchair stair lift which we could operate ourselves.
Then we spend a mostly aimless, but pleasant afternoon together and this is what we did:
Went to the bookstore. Thought about buying a shirt. Didn’t buy anything.
Went to Vince’s dorm. Napped in one of Vince’s 4 beds and ate mango slices.
Decided to go on an adventure to the Santa Ana zoo to find a capybara which many websites told me that they were found there. Called the zoo and found out they haven’t had a capybara for over a decade. THE INTERNET LIES! sigh.
Went to a local marina/wildlife place. Bought a cap in the visitor center for Vince to shield his head from the sun and applied their free sunscreen (how nice!). Walked around outside in the laser-like sun for 15 minutes before settling onto benches where we chatted about nothing really. Made everyone play Pokemon Go.
Went to a japanese grocery store and bought odd asian food.
Went to the adjacent japanese food court and ate ramen and udon. Yummy!
Dropped Vince back at his dorm with big hugs and headed back to LA.
Elka did not go on this Irvine Adventure and we didn’t want to leave her with Julia – we hired a dog sitter for the day which was great. I’ll show you the pics soon.
