Author: Doris

Edda was a bit distraught this morning. We couldn’t figure it out for a little while, but then it dawned on us that she was looking for her beloved grandpa. She had gotten used to him getting her up in the morning and now he was no where to be found! Poor sweetie…

It was strange to wake up without Dad. I had gotten used to having him in the house again.

We booked a taxi for Dad – he insisted that we shouldn’t wake up, but Jeremy did hear the door close at 4:50 am and he woke up and ran to say good-bye, but Dad had already gone off in his taxi.

In Singapore, they have this military amphibious vehicle that was used in the Vietnam War which they have converted into a tourist attraction. It’s been painted to look like a duck because it can go on land like a car and then drive into the water and float and steer like a boat. So today was Duck tour day!

Well Vince was so distraught after watching the safety video (abandon the duck! abandon the duck!) that he demanded a life jacket (“I need the thing that will protect me!!” he wailed) and clung to me for dear life. Edda wanted a nap, so she screamed much of the time. Dad seemed to enjoy it as he was sitting far away from the distressed kids and close to the tour guide who answered all his questions. You know dad, he loves to ask questions. Find a stranger and he will figure out a question to ask them…

This evening, we had a potluck at Julia’s house to say goodbye to the Bodes. We got there at 7 pm sharp and it looked like we wouldn’t make it until 7:30 pm, but somehow we pulled it off and stayed until 9:30. Jeremy made a kick ass salad..

Dad is leaving tomorrow morning at 5 am. It’s been great having him around helping with the kids.

Mom! He washed the dishes every night!

I love you!
I love you too!
I love you three!
I love you eight!
I love you a million!
I love you a million plus 1!

Well, three weeks are almost over. I have had a great time here in Singapore. I have enjoyed a lot with Jeremy, Doris, Vince, Edda and Ruby. I am leaving tomorrow morning and hope to see them again, soon.

Playing with Edda for the past three weeks, I realize how much tough & hard work are ahead for us as a family but, as an optimist, Edda will do her best. She is a brave girl.

Love you all 🙂

What is it about dentists? Jeremy hates dentists. He thinks they are in some complex dental x-ray conspiracy and he has brainwashed me into thinking that dentists are evil people. They seem really nice when you sit down in the chair, but then they give you bad news and make you feel lame about not flossing after every meal and then they head into your mouth with drills and picks.

My dentist in New York was so cool and so smart. She had her office decorated with all modern furniture (I’m sure all flea market finds, tastefully matched but funky too). She played eclectic music over her sound system and had nice retro art prints hanging on the wall. I never knew a dentist could be so cool.

She also went frequently to dental conferences where she could learn about the newest techniques in dentistry and she loved to go and hang with the other cool dentists. But she still didn’t hold back the bad news that my crown needed replacing and it would run, oh, about $1000. Yikes! And then she headed in with her drills and picks.

But this dental story isn’t about me, it’s about Edda. Edda loves to grind her teeth. Lately it’s gotten pretty bad, you can hear her do it every 5 seconds and you can hear it clear across the room. It’s sounds really, really bad.

I also noticed one of her molars had this brownish crap in the little crevice which I was dreading was a cavity.

So what do I do with the fact that I feared a cavity in a 2 year-old’s mouth? I promptly got 4 recommendations of dentists and then didn’t call any of them! For months! I finally made Jeremy call. I’m such a big chicken.

We finally went today to see the dentist. He was very nice – looked about 20 and had a huge collection of Coke cans in his office. (Strange, huh? A dentist collecting sugary drinks… Hmmmm…)

Final verdict: No cavities. Nothing much to do about the grinding. We got shooed home in about 10 minutes and didn’t get charged for the visit.

It’s been 6 months since we had a doctor tell us that our daughter was mentally retarded. What a long six months it has been. We’ve been to the Children’s Hospital here in Singapore countless times, we’ve been back to the US to see specialists there, we’ve looked at schools and therapies for Edda. We considered moving back to the states, we’ve been confused by different doctors and missing test results. How quickly the six months has passed as well.

Many people have talked to me about grief and crying. I have found myself crying many times in the past 6 months, most often in the middle of the night when the house is quiet and everthing is dark. It is then I don’t have shrug my fears aside and the magnitude of Edda’s disabilities sometimes overwhelms me.

Since my dad has been here, I’ve left Edda at home a few times so I could visit friends with Vince. My dad is great with Edda, in the afternoons, she needs to nap and eat frequently. I hate to admit it, the visits were easy with just Vince to manage. Vince does have his own issues (don’t think he is an angel every moment), but Edda is unpredictable with her moods and awkward in strange places and when she is pissed, it is often hard to console her or figure out what she wants. Each time I left Edda behind, Vince asked why she wasn’t coming. I felt bad for leaving her behind. I know in the future, our family will be splitting up trips and activities. This is almost what pains me the most, that we can’t do absolutely everything that I thought we would be able to do together, but perhaps this is an unattainable fantasy for even completely non-disabled families.

Vince and Mathilda playing. Where’s Edda? Not around.

Just for my little brother – I thought you would enjoy this Optimus Prime thing I found. Live action movie – next summer!

Vince took me to a Singapore subway tour. He showed me how to get on subway, headed for Woodland where Jeremy works and get off.

He told me all the regulations on the subway, no food, no pet, no duran (? smelling fruit), etc. Well, the good news was that we didn’t get lost. The bad news, it was just too short.

We bought Edda a new swimming suit. Vince treated himself with ice cream, of course. And I had the privilege to take the subway with my grandkid.

Vince was a great tour guide.

Doris: What the heck are we doing in Singapore?

Jeremy: (shrugs) I dunno.

Doris: I want to go home.

We have no house in the US. We have no address. The address we use for our mail is a mail stop at Jeremy’s US office in Austin, TX. It’s hard to miss home as much as I miss home and not have a physical place to miss.

In the 10 years Jeremy and I have been together, we have lived in the following places: Catalina Dr, Pasadena, CA; Lyndon Ave, South Pasadena, CA; McLaughlin Ave, San Jose, CA; Hester Ave, San Jose, CA; Fair Oaks Ave, Sunnyvale, CA; Riata, Austin, TX; Barton Hills Rd, Austin, TX; Juliet St, Austin, TX; Hsinchu, Taiwan; Bard College, Annandale, NY; Millbrook, NY; Wappingers Falls, NY; Singapore.

That’s a lot of places (13) and I’m not even listing the 2 times we moved to Bard College or the hotels we’ve stayed in for at least 3 weeks. It’s been hectic around here.

I love to move, I love throwing old crap away and staring new again someplace else, but having my kids really makes me want to settle down and get to know my neighbors and see the same dentist for more than a year. (Every dentist I see asks if I’ve had my full mouth x-rays within the last 5 years – that usually means 2 or 3 dentists ago. How can I possibly remember?) Maybe have some friends I don’t have to re-explain my past (engineer), my present (mom) or future (who knows?). Now that would be great…

My mom is so cute. Look what she got us from Old Navy. Vince is grumpy, but Edda and I look great!

Hi, everyone, this is Noel, in case I didn’t log in correctly.

I am still in Singapore right now and will leave early Sunday morning. Although my stay is a short one, I treasure every moment of it.

Vince is a good boy and Edda is brave, to say the least. I saw her fell so many times, but almost every time, she walked with her knees until she reached a chair or sofa in order to get up again using her hands also. Sometimes, she gave those innocent smiles you really couldn’t interpret. Occasionally, you called her and she turned her head and I thought that was one of the most memorable moments that I experienced.

Too bad, three weeks stay is almost coming to an end. And it gave me some memories that I always remembered 🙂

My Yoshoo mesenger does not work. They ask me the click on refresh buttom. I did couple times. It did not work.

The best way to do is to wait for the IT manager comes back from Singapore on 7/30.